Valentine Rant

Sorry this is late, but yeah. So it’s here again. Woopsy freaking doo. First of all, let me just say that Val’s Day is ridiculous. There, I said it. It doesn’t really mean anything to us, does it? And don’t kid yourself now, think about it.

To me this day signifies the following:
1. That your spouse/partner only really goes that extra mile ONE day in a year, and MOSTLY because (i) EVERYONE’s doing it (ii) people’ll think they’re cheapskates if they don’t
2. That YES, you are single, and are spared the harrowing ordeal of thinking up a gift.

I remember in school. It was worse then. Maybe its cos people are just petty like that when they’re surrounded by peers. In secondary school, I remember a year all the girls who got stuff, just compiling all their gifts and taking pictures of the items in different positions. All of them in a neat pile, all the teddies in a circle, each recipient flanked by her gifts… you name it. It was sickening.
On to university. The need to photograph gifts passed, but with it came another need. To harass innocent bystanders all day with this ridiculous concept. Not a year passed that the following DIDN’T happen:

Roommate/Classmate/Some other person that didn’t know better: (Smiling) So who’s Valing you this year?
Me 😦 Non-chalantly) Nobody.
Roommate/Classmate/Some other person that didn’t know better: (Face falling) Aww, don’t worry, maybe next year.

Okkayyy. Or:

Chirpy Person, usually a girl: “Happy Val’s!!!!!”
Me: (Forcing a smile) “Yeah, sure. Whatever

Why the hell do people say that? Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. She’s a hater. She’s bitter. She has no Val’s spirit. You’re right. I don’t. I’ve seen too much crap. People painfully obsessed with how much gifts they get and how many teddies and cakes they have to show for a day that isn’t even important enough to be a public holiday.

Maybe it’s a primarily Nigerian ethic. You know we know how to stretch a good thing. Ordinarily I have no issue with people taking time out to show some lurve, but here? In this area I live in? It’s silly. In my office today, someone was actually talking about how in school, girls used to send THEMSELVES gifts so they won’t look sad. (Helllooo)

Apparently some women still do.

I know what you’re thinking now. When she gets someone, she won’t talk like this. I beg to differ. I’m not saying BAN the thing (even though that won’t be such a bad idea). I just hate the shallowness of it all. The way human beings turn every opportunity they get into getting free stuff. Look at the mess the Western world has made of Christmas and Easter!!!!

I believe love should be an everyday affair. A friend of mine was complaining about how he gets bored easily when it came to relationships, and how he’d be looking for a girl that would surprise him every so often. It’s one of the rare good theories he’s had about relationships. People whine and moan about how they’re single, get a partner, and then it’s what is. BORING. No-one wants to make an effort anymore. After all, I got you, don’t I?
And I don’t mean the occasional recharge card and footing her STUDENT-DISCOUNTED bill at the cinemas either. Yeah, I’m talking to all of you this applies to, you SLACKERS. I’m also not saying BUY HER STUFF or give her cash. MAKE AN EFFORT. Sit down and think about something that makes him/her happy (unless of course you’re an aristo, in which case, cash is the only way to go), an interest. Do something unusual. Once in a while.

Then again, what do I know? Do what you want. I’m not a romantic LIKE THAT. I hate flowers; get nauseated by poetry, OH I HATE POETRY!!! I can’t count how many guys have instantly put me off with lines like, “You are like an angel…” Those few words and I enter auto-pilot.

You know what? I’m bored now. Enough ranting. Enjoy.

One thought on “Valentine Rant

  1. Hi,

    Firstly I hope you recover soon – I’ve also had Malaria and it’s not such fun. I lived in Africa for 37 years and still love the place but have never been to Nigeria.

    As for Valentines day I’m sorry you feel that way. I used to feel like that about Christmas, Easter and all the days but it doesn’t have to be like that. My partner often buys me chocolates, cooks dinner for me etc. Naturally i do nice things for him to. I mean what’s the point of being in a relationship if you’re not going to have fun?

    Evryday is special – it’s just up to people to make it so.

    That’s my 2 cents worth.

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