It’s All Good. Right?

So… It’s safe to say, my Easter was not so joyful. In fact, it was quite horrible. I don’t want to go into details because, well, I really just don’t feel like. But here it is in a nutshell: A lie got out of hand, I got caught, and I felt really guilty cos I got a couple of people involved that really didn’t deserve it. My dad was the one that the whole thing centered around and we were on VERY awkward terms the entire weekend. It’s still awkward, moreso because he hasn’t given me “the talk”. Talk about emotional torture. I was waiting the entire time for him to DO SOMETHING. It also meant cutting my jollying short. Sigh. It wasn’t so, so bad, I guess. My girls still didn’t see “300”, so I’m going to see if I can get one of them to indulge with me this Friday.
However, I can say a couple of things. AVOID BIG LIES. And if by chance you can’t, and it looks like your case is dying, OWN UP. That’s my moral for the day. I feel like I don’t give enough morals on this blog, so digest that .
And, I did come out with a new lease on life this Easter. It didn’t start out too good, and by Saturday afternoon, I was a self-pitying, miserable emotional wreck. Do you ever do that? One or two things don’t work out, and that little bad spirit in you decides to call up EVERY other thing EVER that hasn’t worked out for you, and it blows everything up till you feel like an under-achieving failure? No? What kind of a person ARE you then?
Well, ANYWAY, I get that once in a while. And no, I’m not a suicidal, clinically depressed little girl.
But after a nice little prayer session, and getting some release therapy on Sunday morning, I got my seasonal life refresher. I think we all need that. Once in a while, you just need to sit down, look back at the state of things, and get back on track.
I tagline this phase: FOCUS and DISCIPLINE. I don’t think… ok, I KNOW I don’t have quite enough of that, and there a LOT of things I haven’t been able to do because I tend to give up, lose sight, get bored or get tired. It’s really holding me back. So, I’m gonna work on my discipline, make a decision, and stick to it, no matter how inviting the options are. It’s gonna be hard, but I’m so hell bent on my character development. I’m getting old, girl’s gott make changes!
Moving on though, is anyone feeling this universal darkness in the country? It’s miserable. I mean, you know it’s bad when you’re actually looking forward to work (you hate), JUST so you can be in AC all day.
Oh, and I’ve taking up dancing. Yeah, yeah, I know. AGAIN. I find, it’s the only form of exercise I’m willing to do for a long period of time, and SINCE the last party I went for is almost exactly a year ago (sad, sad words, but it’s TRUE), what’s a girl to do? And I’m so feeling that whole endorphin theory, man. Quite frankly, I figured it had to be true, you know, medically, but in reality, it was just a massive conspiracy. But, you know, I feel REALLY good after dancing. Like, go out and change the world cos it’s so beautiful, good. I’ve got this big, curly hair going on (which everyone is just loving BTW), and it’s fun flipping the thing around.
I decided to be pro-active. (My sister just LOVES that word) So, I’m going over to HQ tomorrow, to fight the good fight to move to IT. Sure, it wont be the end of the world if I stay in Insurance for another 4 months, but OH THE HORROR! Not going down without a fight, I say. I don’t care what my GM says about one being banished to a subsidiary forever (which is a depressing concept). But if that’s the case, gotta go start job-hunting, haven’t we?


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