So, there I was, minding my own business, browsing the net as usual before I got down to serious work, and I happened upon a site I’ve become a bit of a fan of (http://feministe.us/blog) these days:
The first article made my heart break a little. What’s the deal with us in this country? Why are we, as Nigerians, so SELFISH and hypocritical? What’s with all these people who are firmly implanted on their moral high horses? I’m so sick of this pretending to be holier-than-thou crap.
Another such case is the story of the rigged-in Senator (not so sure about this, but I’m hating right now), Ekaete, who feels that of all the laws she could be bringing into light (like addressing the abortion issue above for instance), she felt she ought to tackle ‘indecent dressing’. After all, if a woman gets harassed by a guy because she happens to be wearing something above her knees then it’s her fault, and not the randy, undisciplined fellow that can’t control himself *eye roll*.
Don’t act like y’all don’t see it, a wretched society of double standards and finger-pointing where most people are afraid to express themselves for fear of being condemned by the same people who get up to shadiness in their own homes. The same people who comfortably get away with all kinds of atrocities because they know they also live in a society where certain behavior is pushed into a cupboard, and silence is encouraged. It’s weird. It’s hypocritical. And I’m sick of it. They’ll all wear their best geles and laces and prance into church on Sunday and practically sleep on the altar, so other people will think they’re great, upright people. It’s BS. Women out there judging other young women, when their husbands are busy frollicking with the neighbour’s daughter, and they artfully ‘look the other way’. EEEUUURGGH.
One of my biggest fears for this country is that the backwardness and old-fashioned ignorance will still be carried on to our generation. Sure, a few people would snort and say, ‘Oh, they’re trying to copy Western culture’. I have to ask, is that a 100% bad thing? Riding in fancy cars and building lavish homes made of marble, have they been ingrained in the ‘Nigerian culture’ since the beginning of time? Can anyone fault how far we’ve come while ‘copying’ this EVIL culture? Why then, do we wear suits to work despite the fact that we live in a perpetually warm and unsavory climate for such clothing?
I read a story on Indemili’s (I apologize for messing up this name, but my computer crashed recently, and I lost a lot of my links, so if anyone knows who I mean, please let me know, I’ve been trying to relocate her blog for days) blog about women and keeping silent when their husbands maltreat them. That post hit a nerve. If the husband is cheating/beating his wife, it’s almost acceptable, if a woman has so much as a bad temper, she will be publicly shamed and reported.
Now, I’m not advocating abortion or anything, I mean, if you put your foot in it, deal with it, don’t rob a human being of their chance at life, but I won’t hang anyone I knew for doing it. Our leaders and older folks keep on harping and singing about abstinence (which, FYI, I’m also not against), banning contraceptives, and preaching decent dressing like it’s ever made a difference. People have been fornicating since the word ‘GO’, so such laws, in times as these, when people are straying even further away from the prudish ideologies of our fathers (eg, no male friends, as in, like, seriously?) and many of these above-mentioned ‘moralists’ are sending their children to the (*omg evil*) West, are totally and completely POINTLESS. If nothing else, they’re further pushing people to commit their ‘sins’ in private, and dangerously.
I’m having expression problems. I’m tired of people quick to jump and judge, ‘OMG, look at her skirt, what a tart.’ Or ‘she had a child outside wedlock, she is incapable of ever finding love’, or something equally stupid.
Live and let live. You’re not perfect, so don’t pretend to be. I also don’t have anything against moral, decent people. I have a thing against those ‘decent’ people who feel it’s their place to put others down or lock them in a corner for their imperfections.
Damn… I’ve lost my train of thought for this rant. Please note I was being sarcastic with the whole evil West stuff.